Week 2 of the 2015 NFL season will go down in my personal history as, by far, the worst record I have ever had in making public football picks over three different decades.
Prior to last week, my greatest flop had been a pair of 6-10 embarrassments. Those numbers sparkle after the humiliation of a 4-12 (gasp, choke, gag) failing.
As per tradition, any time a week passes in which the picks are worse than .500, the following week is dedicated to predicting the LOSER of each game.
So here we go, as the long stretch to right the ship begins. Remember, it is LOSER that is being predicted …
Thursday’s Game
REDSKINS at GIANTS, 7:25 p.m., CBS/NFLN
Turns out Washington can play a little defense. Nothing about the Giants screams “winner” expect that the Redskins never win in New Jersey. The loser? WASHINGTON
Sunday’s Games
BENGALS at RAVENS, 12 p.m., CBS
Will the Crows actually fall to 0-3? Yes. The loser? BALTIMORE.
SAINTS at PANTHERS, 12 p.m., FOX
I need a few wins from unexpected places, but the Saints never play well on the road. The loser? NAWHLINS.
RAIDERS at BROWNS, 12 p.m., CBS
Says here the Cleveland pass defense played above their head last week against a poor foe with few weapons. Oakland can strike deep, and will. The loser? CLEVELAND.
FALCONS at COWBOYS, 1 p.m., FOX
Brandon Weeden vs. Matty Ice? The loser? DALLAS.
BUCCANEERS at TEXANS, 12 p.m. FOX
Time for the rest of the Houston teamed not named J.J. Watts to play like they gave a damn. The loser? TAMPA BAY.
CHARGERS at VIKINGS, 12 p.m., CBS
Hey, didn’t you use to be Ragnar? The loser? MINNESOTA.
JAGUARS at PATRIOTS, 12 p.m., CBS
The loser? Do you have to ask? JACKSONVILLE.
EAGLES at JETS, 12 p.m., FOX
New York showed Monday night what they can do against a team with troubles along the offensive line. The loser? PHILADELPHIA.
STEELERS at RAMS, 12 p.m., CBS
I am surprised by brother-from-another-mother Bill is not making the short drive to see this one. Maybe he suspects what I do. The loser? PITTSBURGH.
COLTS at TITANS, 12 p.m., CBS
Could Indy really be 0-3. Yes. Will they? No. The loser? TENNESSEE.
FORTY-NINERS at CARDINALS, 3:05 p.m., FOX
As long as Palmer stays healthy, Arizona is a real threat. The loser? SAN FRANCISCO.
BILLS at DOLPHINS, 3:25 p.m., CBS
So Suh is already acting like a punk? This is a surprise? The loser (other than Suh)? MIAMI.
BEARS at SEAHAWKS, 3:25 p.m., CBS
Nothing cures an 0-2 start like a visit from the Bears. The loser? CHICAGO.
BRONCOS at LIONS, 7:30 p.m., NBC
Even if this game is well-played, the matchup lacks sizzle. Hope something interesting is on cable. The loser? DETROIT.
Monday’s Game
CHIEFS at PACKERS, 7:30 p.m., ESPN
The KC defense could cause some problems for Green Bay. For a while. The loser? KANSAS CITY.
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Last week: 4-12. Season: 12-20.
Pittsburgh isn’ t going to lose. The Jones Dome is a terrible place to watch a game.