The Perry Business and Cultural District was astir Wednesday morning with the welcome advent of Slushy the Snowman, who has been seldom seen so far this winter. Slushy sprang to life as if self-born next to the Let’s Connect Big Bike at the Perry Welcome Depot.
ThePerryNews.com received an early account of Slushy’s coming to Perry by one claiming to be an eye witness to the event.
“Everyone knows about the clown sightings,” said our excited source, “but now there is a snowman sighting at the Perry Welcome Depot at the corner of Willis and First. Apparently, he needs dressing up with a hat, scarf and so on, and he is lacking arms and some of the sensory organs, such as his eyes.”
Since ThePerryNews.com is wary in this new era of “fake news” and does not rush into “print” until all the facts and the alternative facts have been doubly and even triply checked with multiple sources, our local journalist was not able to capture an image of Slushy in all his alleged nakedness, nor would we wish under any circumstances to publish anything that could possibly bring a blush to the cheek of a maiden, as naked snow men and other country matters have sometimes been wont to do.
Our on-the-scene reporter found the Great White One sporting sporty DayGlo colors of pink and green and wearing dark glasses as if blinded by his own damp brilliance. Slushy’s hands were gloved, and he pointed as if to say, “Let’s Connect to Make Perry Great Again! Follow me at #TheRealSlushy!”
There must have been some magic in that DayGlo hat and parti-colored choker they found.
ThePerryNews.com will bring you more information when it becomes official.
Gee, I thought the radio station is the one who gives information when it is “official,” and you guys gave it when it is “available.”